Me, My Dream and Her...

I suddenly got up from the bed. I am still in surprise! Did I just dream her? I could not believe. But yes it’s true that I just dreamt her. But I am still not able to believe as in last five years we barely have any communication. Hmm sometimes once in 5 to 6 months, there might have any call. But long back before 5 years, I had convinced myself and my heart that this one side love is not working out and this does not have any positive result, coz by the time we left college completing our graduation, I confirmed that she is having a boyfriend in her life, rather she confirmed that in a very rude manner in my slam book. I know I loved her most in my life and I do today also but that desperation I don’t have now as I understand her, I am a bit matured person unlike I was at that time. But once again this morning made me think about the memories which I had buried beneath the past.

We were there four persons in my dream who really mattered most during that time when I was there in college and when I consider my love, aah rather one side love episode. And again I surprised to see only those four persons in my dream. Me and her the protagonist in the episode and there are other two, one who was my roommate a very good friend and who was happy for me that I am in love but always tried to embarrass me in front of her having no bitter intention as his nature was like that. He humiliates every one of his friends in his friend list but most of the time; he plays the tricks on me as I am his best friend. So by the end of the episode, he became one of the prominent reasons why she hated me more and the other one who was happy outside that I was in love with her but inside his bitterness kept me away from her, as he became her best friend from my best friend in the passage of time. I could not believe why only we four are there in my dream, I am not able to figure out what might be the occasion which brought us in one room, I don’t have a single valid reason why we four are there in my house. I am clueless, but yes Dreams are always clueless. There might be a long episode in a dream but by the time you get up half of it will be faded away and in next few hours, the dream vanishes completely from your mind as you spend your time thinking how and why these things came out in my dream. Coming to the dream, I can see that she is trying to cook something in my kitchen and the other two trying to help her and we are having a conversion from our past. I am sitting bit far in a corner of the room. I really don’t know when I am with her in any phone call or internet chats then I fill confident enough to talk but when I saw her in front, my heart falls for her, he totally goes out of me. I canot resist him loving her the most, I canot stop him from becoming a slave of her love, I canot stop him worshiping her and now I am used to it. So I am silent part of the conversions. They are discussing all things from the past. She is asking my roommate why he always tried to embarrass her and he is explaining everything. I am happy that she is accepting the words. But whenever she is talking to the other guy, I canot hear a single word. The words fade away before reaching me, those words dissolve in the air and I sit clueless what he is talking to her. I can again hear few words when my roommate asked her, “You should marry him (pointing towards me), as I can say you, nobody in the world loves you more than he loves”. I was not expecting these words never in my life; even I never could gather the courage to speak the three magic words to her. I can see that listening these words, she become stand still like me, whole body frozen out, the sky over head, earth beneath feet stopped revolving, the world just became stand still to watch our feelings, emotions. I can hear those words again and again until she left with the other guy having tears in her eyes. After few time, my dream was trying to faded out, only the frame zooms in, only she came into the frame, I can see her face clearly, then I can see her eyes, then her tears coming down from her eyes, then I can see a drop of tear just about fall on the ground and then I realized the tears in my eyes and then I am out of my dream.
The sky is fine over me, the earth is as usual beneath me and the world is as usual active. I got up and sit and tried to think about the dream sequence. Though there were no tears in my eyes when I got up, my heart was heavy, I barely stand by the sequence just happened in the dream. I am still in a shock though I know that was a dream. But my heart is trying to find the clue why we four were there in my house.